The Next Round: What happens after you change your drinking?

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alcohol and breakups

Rosie Wilby on alcohol and relationships

This week’s podcast is a look back at last month’s fantastic Mindful Drinking Festival in Brighton. One of our two keynote speakers, comedian and author Rosie Wilby, talked about alcohol and relationships, breakups, and making space for one another. Many of you will know Rosie from her podcast, The Breakup Monologues, which is also the title of her brilliant new book.

Looking at how relationships end opens up so many conversations about what makes them work. So Rosie talks to Dru about relationships of all kinds: romantic relationships, friendships, and the spectrum of interpersonal connections that can affect how we change and evolve when they end. If you’re cutting down or cutting out alcohol and relationships begin to change, it can be hard to reconcile who you once were to each other.

Please note that this podcast was recorded as a live panel in front of an audience at our Mindful Drinking Festival. Some background noise appears in this recording at times.

Who is Rosie Wilby?

Rosie Wilby is an award-winning British comedian, author, and host of the podcast The Breakup Monologues. She has appeared many times on BBC Radio 4 programs including Woman’s Hour, Loose Ends, and Four Thought. She has performed at major festivals including Latitude and Glastonbury, and in the finals of several major comedy competitions.

In this special festival recap podcast, Rosie shared insights from her book The Breakup Monologues. This is Rosie’s second book which is based on her acclaimed podcast of the same name and is published globally by Bloomsbury.

What was this festival keynote discussion about?

Alcohol and relationships aren’t always good bedfellows. Comedian Rosie can recount this from a personal perspective. Her discussion with Club Soda co-founder Dru about how to find unexpected joy in break-ups, and navigate them more mindfully.

If you’re going to the pub person, you’ll find a going to the pub person to be in a relationship with. And that can actually then start relationships under significant strain, if more than half of a couple changes. So if you decide ‘I’m going to cut down significantly’ or ‘I’m going to stop drinking completely’, suddenly, it can feel like you’re moving your relationship in separate directions.

Dru Jaeger

Oftentimes, we can ditch our goals in order to fit in with our partners. But Rosie is clear: you don’t have to be on the same path all the time.

If there was one partner in a relationship that wanted to continue sometimes having a drink, and one person has given up completely, maybe they do that with a different friend. That’s totally healthy and totally fun. So I think you can go on separate journeys some of the time and come back together again. You can still support one another through whatever’s going on. But I do think actually seeking different spaces to be different parts of yourself is a really happy thing.

Rosie Wilby

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